1 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:24,160 SONG: # Cue the pulse to begin 2 00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:26,440 SONG: # Cue the pulse to begin 3 00:00:34,920 --> 00:00:34,960 # Cue the pulse to begin 4 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:37,120 # Cue the pulse to begin 5 00:00:38,840 --> 00:00:38,880 # Cue the pulse to begin 6 00:00:38,880 --> 00:00:40,560 # Cue the pulse to begin 7 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:42,040 # Cue the pulse to begin. # 8 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:44,800 # Cue the pulse to begin. # 9 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:47,240 (Men grunt with exertion) CUTLERY CLATTERS 10 00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:50,160 (Men grunt with exertion) CUTLERY CLATTERS 11 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:53,880 (Both grunt with exertion) 12 00:00:53,880 --> 00:00:56,840 (Both grunt with exertion) 13 00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:01,120 Oh, yeah. Fuck. 14 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:02,560 Oh, yeah. Fuck. 15 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:06,280 Oh, yeah. Come here. 16 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:08,280 Oh, yeah. Come here. 17 00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:08,320 Come here, come here, come here. 18 00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:10,680 Come here, come here, come here. 19 00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:10,720 Yeah...yeah, come here. Yeah. 20 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:14,520 Yeah...yeah, come here. Yeah. 21 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:14,560 (Grunts with exertion) 22 00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:16,080 (Grunts with exertion) 23 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:17,160 Yeah. Oh, that feel... 24 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:18,600 Yeah. Oh, that feel... 25 00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:18,640 That feel good, baby? 26 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,120 That feel good, baby? 27 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:20,160 Yeah. That's it. Right there. Don't stop. 28 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:22,280 Yeah. That's it. Right there. Don't stop. 29 00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:22,320 DOORBELL RINGS 30 00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:23,960 DOORBELL RINGS 31 00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:24,000 Right there. Don't stop. Just...don't stop. 32 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,320 Right there. Don't stop. Just...don't stop. 33 00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:26,360 Just... Arggh! 34 00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:27,800 Just... Arggh! 35 00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:27,840 Keep going. I'm coming. Arggh! Yeah! 36 00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:29,520 Keep going. I'm coming. Arggh! Yeah! 37 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:29,560 Oh! Oh, fuck! DOORBELL RINGS IMPATIENTLY 38 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:32,320 Oh! Oh, fuck! DOORBELL RINGS IMPATIENTLY 39 00:01:32,320 --> 00:01:32,360 Oh...I'm coming. 40 00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:33,880 Oh...I'm coming. 41 00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:33,920 (Yells to the door) I'm coming! 42 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:35,640 (Yells to the door) I'm coming! 43 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:35,680 That's it. Come on. Oh, yeah. Come on! 44 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:39,080 That's it. Come on. Oh, yeah. Come on! 45 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:39,120 Oh...oh...OH! 46 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:41,880 Oh...oh...OH! 47 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:43,800 Hello, sir. 48 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:45,280 Hello, sir. 49 00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:45,320 I'm Charlotte and this is Amanda, 50 00:01:45,320 --> 00:01:46,960 I'm Charlotte and this is Amanda, 51 00:01:46,960 --> 00:01:47,000 and we're here to talk to you about Proposition 14. 52 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,400 and we're here to talk to you about Proposition 14. 53 00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:49,440 Are you aware of it? Yes, I'm aware of it. 54 00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:51,880 Are you aware of it? Yes, I'm aware of it. 55 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:51,920 Good, then we needn't tell you how important it these days 56 00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:54,600 Good, then we needn't tell you how important it these days 57 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:54,640 to protect the holy bonds of matrimony and the American family. 58 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:57,600 to protect the holy bonds of matrimony and the American family. 59 00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:57,640 Isn't that the God's honest truth? 60 00:01:57,640 --> 00:01:59,720 Isn't that the God's honest truth? 61 00:01:59,720 --> 00:01:59,760 Are you married? I most certainly am. 62 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:01,520 Are you married? I most certainly am. 63 00:02:01,520 --> 00:02:01,560 In that case, we would love to speak with you and your wife. 64 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:04,760 In that case, we would love to speak with you and your wife. 65 00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:04,800 Honey, there are some very sweet ladies here 66 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:07,560 Honey, there are some very sweet ladies here 67 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:07,600 urging us to support Proposition 14. 68 00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:09,720 urging us to support Proposition 14. 69 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:10,800 Do you have children? A son and a daughter. 70 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:13,200 Do you have children? A son and a daughter. 71 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:13,240 Oh, that's wonderful. (Laughs) 72 00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:14,920 Oh, that's wonderful. (Laughs) 73 00:02:14,920 --> 00:02:14,960 (Laughs) Good afternoon, ladies. 74 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:16,520 (Laughs) Good afternoon, ladies. 75 00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:16,560 This is my lawfully wedded husband. 76 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:18,120 This is my lawfully wedded husband. 77 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:18,160 And this is MY lawfully wedded husband. 78 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:20,120 And this is MY lawfully wedded husband. 79 00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:21,240 And we are going to do everything in our power 80 00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:23,440 And we are going to do everything in our power 81 00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:23,480 to defeat Proposition 14. 82 00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:25,880 to defeat Proposition 14. 83 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:25,920 I see. (Clears throat) OK. 84 00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:27,560 I see. (Clears throat) OK. 85 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:27,600 Well. Good afternoon, then. 86 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:29,080 Well. Good afternoon, then. 87 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:29,120 Hey, thanks for stopping by. We'll be sure to vote. 88 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:31,280 Hey, thanks for stopping by. We'll be sure to vote. 89 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:31,320 Bye-bye. 90 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:33,120 Bye-bye. 91 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:40,560 I caught that. 92 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:42,480 I caught that. 93 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:42,520 Caught what? 94 00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:44,040 Caught what? 95 00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:44,080 That subtle exchange of smiles that can indicate only one thing. 96 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:46,960 That subtle exchange of smiles that can indicate only one thing. 97 00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:47,000 "Is your ass is as sore as mine?" 98 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,520 "Is your ass is as sore as mine?" 99 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:49,560 BRIAN: Fucking Christ, Theodore, 100 00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:51,160 BRIAN: Fucking Christ, Theodore, 101 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:51,200 is there anyone in this burg you haven't boned 102 00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:52,920 is there anyone in this burg you haven't boned 103 00:02:52,920 --> 00:02:52,960 since your extreme makeover? 104 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,520 since your extreme makeover? 105 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:54,600 Well, let's just say that if they don't get a fresh supply in soon, 106 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:58,040 Well, let's just say that if they don't get a fresh supply in soon, 107 00:02:58,040 --> 00:02:58,080 I'll be forced to move to Philadelphia. 108 00:02:58,080 --> 00:02:59,720 I'll be forced to move to Philadelphia. 109 00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:01,680 You know, I always used to wonder what it would be like 110 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:04,120 You know, I always used to wonder what it would be like 111 00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:04,160 to have any guy I wanted - now I know. 112 00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:06,440 to have any guy I wanted - now I know. 113 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:06,480 And? 114 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:07,920 And? 115 00:03:07,920 --> 00:03:07,960 And, it's, um...great. 116 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:12,080 And, it's, um...great. 117 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:12,120 Hey, look who it is! Michael! 118 00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:13,800 Hey, look who it is! Michael! 119 00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:15,440 Hey, Teddy. 120 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:17,000 Hey, Teddy. 121 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:17,080 Hey, Em. Hi, sweetie. 122 00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:18,720 Hey, Em. Hi, sweetie. 123 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:20,040 Well, if you boys will excuse me, I have to get back to work. 124 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:23,120 Well, if you boys will excuse me, I have to get back to work. 125 00:03:26,880 --> 00:03:26,920 Yeah...I've got to get back to the store. 126 00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:29,000 Yeah...I've got to get back to the store. 127 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:32,400 Busy day? 128 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:33,960 Busy day? 129 00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:34,000 Yeah, this comic book collection that I bought off eBay just arrived. 130 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,840 Yeah, this comic book collection that I bought off eBay just arrived. 131 00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:36,880 It's going to take me weeks to inspect and grade them. 132 00:03:36,880 --> 00:03:39,400 It's going to take me weeks to inspect and grade them. 133 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:39,440 Well, better have something to eat. What'll it be? 134 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:42,320 Well, better have something to eat. What'll it be? 135 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:42,360 I think I'll have... 136 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:44,240 I think I'll have... 137 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:44,280 Are you and Brian ever going to talk to each other again? 138 00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:46,680 Are you and Brian ever going to talk to each other again? 139 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:46,720 Ma... Michael! 140 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,160 Ma... Michael! 141 00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:48,200 You've been friends - brothers - since you were kids. 142 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:51,120 You've been friends - brothers - since you were kids. 143 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:51,160 You love each other. 144 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:52,560 You love each other. 145 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:53,640 You're going to let a lifetime of fucking history go down the drain 146 00:03:53,640 --> 00:03:57,600 You're going to let a lifetime of fucking history go down the drain 147 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:57,640 'cause of some childish disagreement? 148 00:03:57,640 --> 00:03:59,240 'cause of some childish disagreement? 149 00:03:59,240 --> 00:03:59,280 And believe me, I know what I'm talking about. 150 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:01,680 And believe me, I know what I'm talking about. 151 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:01,720 It's not childish, and it's not just a disagreement. 152 00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:05,120 It's not childish, and it's not just a disagreement. 153 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:05,160 He disrespects every choice I have made. 154 00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:07,520 He disrespects every choice I have made. 155 00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:07,560 He mocks me for wanting a family and home. 156 00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:10,360 He mocks me for wanting a family and home. 157 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:10,400 He calls me a defector. 158 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:11,880 He calls me a defector. 159 00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:11,920 He even blames me for his and Justin's break-up. 160 00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:14,080 He even blames me for his and Justin's break-up. 161 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:14,120 He says I infected him. 162 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:15,480 He says I infected him. 163 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:16,600 Well, he can think whatever he wants and call me whatever he pleases. 164 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:19,920 Well, he can think whatever he wants and call me whatever he pleases. 165 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:19,960 It really doesn't matter anymore. 166 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,440 It really doesn't matter anymore. 167 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:22,560 I'll have the tuna fish on whole-wheat with a lemon bar. 168 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:26,080 I'll have the tuna fish on whole-wheat with a lemon bar. 169 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:26,120 Hold the remarks. 170 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:27,720 Hold the remarks. 171 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:30,440 We're going door-to-door today to try and get people to listen. 172 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:32,800 We're going door-to-door today to try and get people to listen. 173 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:32,840 A lot of them may not want to, 174 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,560 A lot of them may not want to, 175 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:34,600 so don't be discouraged if you get doors slammed in your face. 176 00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:37,600 so don't be discouraged if you get doors slammed in your face. 177 00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:37,640 Just be courteous, make your point succinctly, 178 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:40,280 Just be courteous, make your point succinctly, 179 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:40,320 and whatever you do, do not engage. 180 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:42,880 and whatever you do, do not engage. 181 00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:42,920 That means don't lose your fucking temper and shoot off your big mouth. 182 00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:45,800 That means don't lose your fucking temper and shoot off your big mouth. 183 00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:45,840 CHUCKLING Heh...exactly. Good luck. 184 00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:48,160 CHUCKLING Heh...exactly. Good luck. 185 00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:49,280 Ready? Yeah. 186 00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:50,720 Ready? Yeah. 187 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:50,760 I hope they don't come out swinging - 188 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:52,760 I hope they don't come out swinging - 189 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:52,800 not with the fortune I just spent on my face. 190 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:54,800 not with the fortune I just spent on my face. 191 00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:54,840 What a lovely face it is too. You must get lots of compliments. 192 00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:58,160 What a lovely face it is too. You must get lots of compliments. 193 00:04:58,160 --> 00:04:58,200 I've been getting more than that. (Chuckles lasciviously) 194 00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:00,440 I've been getting more than that. (Chuckles lasciviously) 195 00:05:01,840 --> 00:05:01,880 To tell you the truth... something's missing. 196 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:05,080 To tell you the truth... something's missing. 197 00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:05,120 Love? Commitment? 198 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:06,920 Love? Commitment? 199 00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:06,960 Yeah, something like that. What you need is a husband. 200 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:09,280 Yeah, something like that. What you need is a husband. 201 00:05:09,280 --> 00:05:09,320 Yeah! (Scoffs) First I need a boyfriend. 202 00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:12,400 Yeah! (Scoffs) First I need a boyfriend. 203 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:12,440 But that won't be easy. 204 00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:14,600 But that won't be easy. 205 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:14,640 My standards are ridiculously high. 206 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:17,040 My standards are ridiculously high. 207 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:17,080 I want someone who's financially secure, with a face like Brad Pitt, 208 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:21,080 I want someone who's financially secure, with a face like Brad Pitt, 209 00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:21,120 a body like Brad Pitt, and hung like... 210 00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:23,800 a body like Brad Pitt, and hung like... 211 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:23,840 ..well, just hung. 212 00:05:23,840 --> 00:05:25,360 ..well, just hung. 213 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:25,400 That's not so ridiculous. It's absurd. 214 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,000 That's not so ridiculous. It's absurd. 215 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:27,040 Listen, if you really want to get hitched, you need a Jewish guy. 216 00:05:27,040 --> 00:05:29,760 Listen, if you really want to get hitched, you need a Jewish guy. 217 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:29,800 They make the best marriage material. 218 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,400 They make the best marriage material. 219 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:31,440 They do? Yeah. 220 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:32,880 They do? Yeah. 221 00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:32,920 Provided you can get past the incestuous relationship 222 00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:34,760 Provided you can get past the incestuous relationship 223 00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:34,800 they have with their mothers that lasts beyond the grave. 224 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:37,000 they have with their mothers that lasts beyond the grave. 225 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:38,920 Good afternoon, sir. We're here to talk to you about Proposition 14. 226 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,680 Good afternoon, sir. We're here to talk to you about Proposition 14. 227 00:05:41,680 --> 00:05:41,720 We'll only take a minute of your time. 228 00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:43,600 We'll only take a minute of your time. 229 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:43,640 Or less. 230 00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:45,080 Or less. 231 00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:46,800 Well. 232 00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:48,040 Well. 233 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:48,080 It may not be easy, but at least it gets you out of the house. 234 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:51,160 It may not be easy, but at least it gets you out of the house. 235 00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:51,200 That's what Michael said. 236 00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,520 That's what Michael said. 237 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:53,560 Keeping busy would take my mind off Hunter. 238 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:55,640 Keeping busy would take my mind off Hunter. 239 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:55,680 So far it hasn't helped. Give it time. 240 00:05:55,680 --> 00:05:58,360 So far it hasn't helped. Give it time. 241 00:05:58,360 --> 00:05:58,400 How much time? A lifetime? 242 00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:00,880 How much time? A lifetime? 243 00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:00,920 'Cause that's how long it'll take for me to forget about him. 244 00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:03,600 'Cause that's how long it'll take for me to forget about him. 245 00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:07,320 Oh, hi. What can I do for you folks? 246 00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:10,160 Oh, hi. What can I do for you folks? 247 00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:10,200 We'd like to talk to you about Proposition 14. 248 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,400 We'd like to talk to you about Proposition 14. 249 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:12,440 It's very important that you vote no. 250 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,080 It's very important that you vote no. 251 00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:14,120 Oh, why is that, son? 252 00:06:14,120 --> 00:06:15,720 Oh, why is that, son? 253 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:15,760 If it passes, gay men and women will lose the same rights 254 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:18,680 If it passes, gay men and women will lose the same rights 255 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:18,720 that other Americans have. 256 00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,160 that other Americans have. 257 00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:20,200 And who's to say what's next? 258 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,720 And who's to say what's next? 259 00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:21,760 The elderly could lose their social security. 260 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:23,680 The elderly could lose their social security. 261 00:06:23,680 --> 00:06:23,720 Women could lose their right to have an abortion. 262 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:26,160 Women could lose their right to have an abortion. 263 00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:26,200 I see your point. You've got my vote. 264 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:29,560 I see your point. You've got my vote. 265 00:06:29,560 --> 00:06:29,600 WOMAN: Dad, who's at the door? 266 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:32,400 WOMAN: Dad, who's at the door? 267 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:32,440 Hello. 268 00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:33,920 Hello. 269 00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:33,960 We were just talking to your father about voting no for Proposition 14. 270 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:38,080 We were just talking to your father about voting no for Proposition 14. 271 00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:38,120 My father hasn't voted in 10 years. 272 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:41,120 My father hasn't voted in 10 years. 273 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:41,160 He has Alzheimer's. 274 00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:42,680 He has Alzheimer's. 275 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:42,720 Come on, Dad. 276 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,120 Come on, Dad. 277 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:46,840 Trust me, Jim. 278 00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,640 Trust me, Jim. 279 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:51,240 Look, why don't we have lunch tomorrow? 280 00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:52,960 Look, why don't we have lunch tomorrow? 281 00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:53,000 I'll ply you with martinis 282 00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:54,480 I'll ply you with martinis 283 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:54,520 and I guarantee you will see things my way. 284 00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:58,160 and I guarantee you will see things my way. 285 00:06:58,160 --> 00:06:58,200 Oh. 286 00:06:58,200 --> 00:06:59,680 Oh. 287 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:02,120 Feldon's losing his hard-on for the new Home Station ad. 288 00:07:02,120 --> 00:07:05,240 Feldon's losing his hard-on for the new Home Station ad. 289 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:05,280 Well, you have to admit, it's a bit suggestive. 290 00:07:05,280 --> 00:07:08,080 Well, you have to admit, it's a bit suggestive. 291 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:08,120 You also have to admit it's genius. 292 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:12,680 You also have to admit it's genius. 293 00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:12,720 Listen, how about coming with me to Beth Emanuel's mixer? 294 00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:15,400 Listen, how about coming with me to Beth Emanuel's mixer? 295 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:15,440 Who's she? 296 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:17,240 Who's she? 297 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:17,280 It's a temple. 298 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,120 It's a temple. 299 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:19,160 They're having their monthly gay get-together at Woody's, 300 00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:21,520 They're having their monthly gay get-together at Woody's, 301 00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:21,560 and I want to meet a mensch. 302 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:23,480 and I want to meet a mensch. 303 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:23,520 Settle down. 304 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:24,960 Settle down. 305 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:25,000 Christ! 306 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,240 Christ! 307 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:26,280 Am I the only fag who doesn't want to put a trousseau together 308 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,240 Am I the only fag who doesn't want to put a trousseau together 309 00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:29,280 and walk down the aisle? 310 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:30,960 and walk down the aisle? 311 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:31,000 Listen, I'm not getting any younger. 312 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:34,200 Listen, I'm not getting any younger. 313 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:34,240 I'll be 35 this... 9. 314 00:07:34,240 --> 00:07:35,600 I'll be 35 this... 9. 315 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:37,120 What? 39. 316 00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:38,760 What? 39. 317 00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:38,800 Uh... 318 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:40,240 Uh... 319 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:40,280 I'm your employer. 320 00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:42,240 I'm your employer. 321 00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:42,280 There's a paper trail. 322 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:43,760 There's a paper trail. 323 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:43,800 Why don't you ask Justin? 324 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,200 Why don't you ask Justin? 325 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:46,240 Rumour has it he's hot for a hubby. 326 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:48,480 Rumour has it he's hot for a hubby. 327 00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:48,520 Just thought I'd ask. 328 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,120 Just thought I'd ask. 329 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:50,160 There are many uncertainties in this life, Theodore, 330 00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:52,800 There are many uncertainties in this life, Theodore, 331 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:52,840 many...mysteries beyond our comprehension. 332 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,560 many...mysteries beyond our comprehension. 333 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:55,600 But one thing I know for a fact - 334 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,440 But one thing I know for a fact - 335 00:07:57,440 --> 00:07:57,480 I will never be Mrs Seymour Goldfarb. 336 00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:59,480 I will never be Mrs Seymour Goldfarb. 337 00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:05,200 I wish we'd been able to convince more people. 338 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:07,400 I wish we'd been able to convince more people. 339 00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:07,440 Well, the important thing is we keep on trying, huh? 340 00:08:07,440 --> 00:08:10,000 Well, the important thing is we keep on trying, huh? 341 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:10,040 Oh...uh... 342 00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:13,080 Oh...uh... 343 00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:14,640 Am I late? 344 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:16,120 Am I late? 345 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:16,160 No. We just got here ourselves. 346 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:19,280 No. We just got here ourselves. 347 00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:19,320 Who's he? 348 00:08:19,320 --> 00:08:20,920 Who's he? 349 00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:20,960 We'll talk later. Wha...? 350 00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:23,400 We'll talk later. Wha...? 351 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:24,880 Hi. Hi. 352 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,800 Hi. Hi. 353 00:08:33,640 --> 00:08:33,680 Keep up the good work, honey! 354 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,480 Keep up the good work, honey! 355 00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:56,720 Have you seen a letter signed by Judge Salzman? 356 00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,440 Have you seen a letter signed by Judge Salzman? 357 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:00,800 Hmm... 358 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,960 Hmm... 359 00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:06,880 I wonder how it got into my pile. 360 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,600 I wonder how it got into my pile. 361 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:08,640 Beats me. 362 00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:10,040 Beats me. 363 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:12,440 You didn't happen to see an invoice 364 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:14,320 You didn't happen to see an invoice 365 00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:14,360 from the Resnick Gallery in New York, did you? 366 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:16,760 from the Resnick Gallery in New York, did you? 367 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:16,800 Oh. It's right here. 368 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:19,440 Oh. It's right here. 369 00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:19,480 Must've gotten mixed up with my stuff by mistake. 370 00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:22,480 Must've gotten mixed up with my stuff by mistake. 371 00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:24,320 What's this? 372 00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:26,240 What's this? 373 00:09:26,240 --> 00:09:26,280 Oh, that's a piece Justin has in the art show. 374 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,320 Oh, that's a piece Justin has in the art show. 375 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:28,360 Wait till you see it. 376 00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:29,800 Wait till you see it. 377 00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:31,720 You are coming to the opening, aren't you? 378 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:33,920 You are coming to the opening, aren't you? 379 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:33,960 Actually, I'm supposed to go out with, uh... 380 00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:36,400 Actually, I'm supposed to go out with, uh... 381 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:36,440 Corinne. 382 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:37,960 Corinne. 383 00:09:39,560 --> 00:09:39,600 Mel, you don't have to hide it. 384 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:41,440 Mel, you don't have to hide it. 385 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:41,480 That's our arrangement - you have your life, I have mine. 386 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:44,360 That's our arrangement - you have your life, I have mine. 387 00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:44,400 I know, but I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. It's your show. 388 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:47,200 I know, but I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. It's your show. 389 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:47,240 That's right, it's my show, and I'm inviting you. 390 00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:49,880 That's right, it's my show, and I'm inviting you. 391 00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:51,040 And Corinne. 392 00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:52,960 And Corinne. 393 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:53,000 Are you sure? I'm fine with it. Really. 394 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:56,560 Are you sure? I'm fine with it. Really. 395 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:02,920 (Sighs) Now, what have I done with Untitled I and II? 396 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:07,520 (Sighs) Now, what have I done with Untitled I and II? 397 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:09,840 It's right here under Newcombe v. Budge. 398 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:12,760 It's right here under Newcombe v. Budge. 399 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:15,880 DOG BARKS, EXCITED HUBBUB 400 00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:18,840 DOG BARKS, EXCITED HUBBUB 401 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:23,400 What do you think? 402 00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,360 What do you think? 403 00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:25,400 Oh, a giraffe! Isn't that cute, huh? 404 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:27,480 Oh, a giraffe! Isn't that cute, huh? 405 00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:27,520 It's a swan. 406 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:29,280 It's a swan. 407 00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:29,320 Oh. I can see that...kinda. 408 00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:32,760 Oh. I can see that...kinda. 409 00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:32,800 It's for my next segment. They want something cute. 410 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:35,880 It's for my next segment. They want something cute. 411 00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:35,920 There are a couple of reporters camped out the front. 412 00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:38,720 There are a couple of reporters camped out the front. 413 00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:38,760 Shit! 414 00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:40,440 Shit! 415 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:40,480 Look at this - they took an old photograph of me 416 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:43,240 Look at this - they took an old photograph of me 417 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:43,280 and made it look like I'm in Babylon. 418 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:45,000 and made it look like I'm in Babylon. 419 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:45,040 I've never even been to Babylon. 420 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,560 I've never even been to Babylon. 421 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:46,600 You know, last week they put poor Liza's head 422 00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:48,720 You know, last week they put poor Liza's head 423 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:48,760 on the body of a 400lb woman. 424 00:10:48,760 --> 00:10:50,640 on the body of a 400lb woman. 425 00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:50,680 They said she was too fat to get out of bed. 426 00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:52,960 They said she was too fat to get out of bed. 427 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:53,000 You can't let that trash get to you. 428 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:55,320 You can't let that trash get to you. 429 00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:55,360 Besides, it'll all stop once you come out. 430 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:57,320 Besides, it'll all stop once you come out. 431 00:10:58,640 --> 00:10:58,680 You're going to come out? 432 00:10:58,680 --> 00:11:00,120 You're going to come out? 433 00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:01,480 When?! Huh? When, honey? 434 00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:04,560 When?! Huh? When, honey? 435 00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:04,600 I haven't decided yet. 436 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:06,040 I haven't decided yet. 437 00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:07,080 Well, I say Larry King. 438 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:09,120 Well, I say Larry King. 439 00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:09,160 I mean, if it was me, I'd definitely come out to Larry. 440 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:12,560 I mean, if it was me, I'd definitely come out to Larry. 441 00:11:12,560 --> 00:11:12,600 I mean, you know, of course, 442 00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:14,120 I mean, you know, of course, 443 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:14,160 however you decide to do it, it has to be your way. 444 00:11:14,160 --> 00:11:16,520 however you decide to do it, it has to be your way. 445 00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:16,560 Yeah, Deb's right - you got to do it on your own terms. 446 00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:18,920 Yeah, Deb's right - you got to do it on your own terms. 447 00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:18,960 Oh. You got some sauce on your chin, baby. 448 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:23,360 Oh. You got some sauce on your chin, baby. 449 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:23,400 That was my swan. 450 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:24,880 That was my swan. 451 00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:24,920 It was a giraffe, honey. (Chuckles) Try again. 452 00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:27,680 It was a giraffe, honey. (Chuckles) Try again. 453 00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:31,640 You know, I've got one hell of a nerve. 454 00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:33,720 You know, I've got one hell of a nerve. 455 00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:33,760 I'm sitting here like some fucking eunuch, 456 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,120 I'm sitting here like some fucking eunuch, 457 00:11:36,120 --> 00:11:36,160 making animals out of napkins 458 00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:38,000 making animals out of napkins 459 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:38,040 to delight the guests at your next dinner party, 460 00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:40,080 to delight the guests at your next dinner party, 461 00:11:40,080 --> 00:11:40,120 and I'm telling YOU how to be out and proud. 462 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,960 and I'm telling YOU how to be out and proud. 463 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:49,040 It's a funny story how we met. (Laughs) 464 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,720 It's a funny story how we met. (Laughs) 465 00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:51,760 I'm always up for a laugh. 466 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:53,360 I'm always up for a laugh. 467 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:53,400 Well, I-I was dropping Molly off at school, 468 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:56,000 Well, I-I was dropping Molly off at school, 469 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:56,040 when, wouldn't you know, I get a flat. 470 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:58,440 when, wouldn't you know, I get a flat. 471 00:11:58,440 --> 00:11:58,480 Just then, this motorcycle comes roaring up 472 00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:01,920 Just then, this motorcycle comes roaring up 473 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:01,960 and this guy dressed all in black asks me if I want help. 474 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:06,680 and this guy dressed all in black asks me if I want help. 475 00:12:06,680 --> 00:12:06,720 Well, I had taken that night class in car maintenance 476 00:12:06,720 --> 00:12:08,880 Well, I had taken that night class in car maintenance 477 00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:08,920 after your father left, 478 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:10,400 after your father left, 479 00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:10,440 but I...I was on my way to an open house. 480 00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:13,160 but I...I was on my way to an open house. 481 00:12:13,160 --> 00:12:13,200 I didn't want to show up looking like a...grease monkey... (Laughs) 482 00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,720 I didn't want to show up looking like a...grease monkey... (Laughs) 483 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:17,800 ..so I said yes, and it turned out to be Tuck. 484 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:21,480 ..so I said yes, and it turned out to be Tuck. 485 00:12:22,640 --> 00:12:22,680 'Tuck'? It's short for 'Tucker'. 486 00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:26,040 'Tuck'? It's short for 'Tucker'. 487 00:12:26,040 --> 00:12:26,080 He teaches eighth-grade science at Molly's school. (Chuckles) 488 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:28,960 He teaches eighth-grade science at Molly's school. (Chuckles) 489 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:29,000 Wow. My sides are splitting. 490 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:31,920 Wow. My sides are splitting. 491 00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:33,880 So...we got to chatting. 492 00:12:33,880 --> 00:12:37,600 So...we got to chatting. 493 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:37,640 He asked me if I wanted to go out some night for a coffee... 494 00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:40,680 He asked me if I wanted to go out some night for a coffee... 495 00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:40,720 Coffee? Aren't his parents afraid it might stunt his growth? 496 00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:43,720 Coffee? Aren't his parents afraid it might stunt his growth? 497 00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:45,200 Do you want to hear this or not? 498 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,000 Do you want to hear this or not? 499 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:47,040 (Clears throat) 500 00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:48,560 (Clears throat) 501 00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:48,600 Well, I figured, what the hell? 502 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:52,040 Well, I figured, what the hell? 503 00:12:52,040 --> 00:12:52,080 It beats sitting at home, reading 'How to Survive a Divorce', 504 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:55,920 It beats sitting at home, reading 'How to Survive a Divorce', 505 00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:55,960 so I said yes. 506 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:57,720 so I said yes. 507 00:12:57,720 --> 00:12:57,760 And...the rest is history. 508 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:01,080 And...the rest is history. 509 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:01,120 For him, modern. For you, ancient. 510 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:03,640 For him, modern. For you, ancient. 511 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:04,880 I take it you don't approve. 512 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:06,400 I take it you don't approve. 513 00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:06,440 I suppose a woman of your age is allowed to have a little fling... 514 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:09,680 I suppose a woman of your age is allowed to have a little fling... 515 00:13:09,680 --> 00:13:09,720 ..provided it's discreet. 516 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:11,200 ..provided it's discreet. 517 00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:13,080 Well, actually, it's... it's more than a little fling. 518 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:17,840 Well, actually, it's... it's more than a little fling. 519 00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:17,880 We've been seeing each other for six months. 520 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:19,560 We've been seeing each other for six months. 521 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:21,240 For six months? And you never said anything? 522 00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:23,560 For six months? And you never said anything? 523 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:25,440 What was the point until I was sure it was serious? 524 00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:28,080 What was the point until I was sure it was serious? 525 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:28,120 Serious? 526 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:29,800 Serious? 527 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:29,840 You are NOT serious. He's one-third your age. 528 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,480 You are NOT serious. He's one-third your age. 529 00:13:32,480 --> 00:13:32,520 Half. Fine. Half. He's half your age. 530 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:35,840 Half. Fine. Half. He's half your age. 531 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:35,880 He's still young enough to be your s... 532 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:38,080 He's still young enough to be your s... 533 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:38,120 I don't even want to say it. 534 00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:39,960 I don't even want to say it. 535 00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:40,000 And I don't want to hear it. 536 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,640 And I don't want to hear it. 537 00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:42,880 Especially from you. 538 00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:44,520 Especially from you. 539 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:51,640 JAZZ PLAYS 540 00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:54,480 JAZZ PLAYS 541 00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:54,520 KNOCK AT DOOR 542 00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,280 KNOCK AT DOOR 543 00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:09,400 You alone? 544 00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:10,840 You alone? 545 00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:12,200 One of those rare unexpected moments. 546 00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:14,520 One of those rare unexpected moments. 547 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:14,560 Ah. 548 00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:16,240 Ah. 549 00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:17,560 So much...for the moment. 550 00:14:17,560 --> 00:14:20,080 So much...for the moment. 551 00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:20,120 That Thelonious? 552 00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:21,560 That Thelonious? 553 00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:23,920 That, er...tuna macaroni casserole? 554 00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:27,200 That, er...tuna macaroni casserole? 555 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:27,240 You got it. 556 00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:29,040 You got it. 557 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:29,080 I don't want it. 558 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:30,960 I don't want it. 559 00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:31,000 Tuna casserole means that we're going to get stoned 560 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,520 Tuna casserole means that we're going to get stoned 561 00:14:33,520 --> 00:14:33,560 and have a very meaningful conversation. 562 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,440 and have a very meaningful conversation. 563 00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:36,520 Unfortunately, I just finished my last joint. 564 00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:39,360 Unfortunately, I just finished my last joint. 565 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:39,400 Well, fortunately... (Chuckles) 566 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:41,480 Well, fortunately... (Chuckles) 567 00:14:43,120 --> 00:14:43,160 ..I brought one with me. 568 00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:44,960 ..I brought one with me. 569 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:00,760 Does Detective Horvath know that his blushing bride is a pothead? 570 00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:04,320 Does Detective Horvath know that his blushing bride is a pothead? 571 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:06,640 Nothing kills a good relationship faster than full disclosure. 572 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:09,840 Nothing kills a good relationship faster than full disclosure. 573 00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:11,560 Give me some of that. 574 00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:13,000 Give me some of that. 575 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:19,520 I don't like the way you've been treating Michael. 576 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:21,920 I don't like the way you've been treating Michael. 577 00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:23,520 Butt the fuck out. 578 00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:25,040 Butt the fuck out. 579 00:15:28,920 --> 00:15:28,960 You've been on his case 580 00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,600 You've been on his case 581 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:30,640 ever since he and Ben bought that house together. 582 00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:32,760 ever since he and Ben bought that house together. 583 00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:32,800 He didn't just buy a house. 584 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,640 He didn't just buy a house. 585 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:36,440 He bought the slicer and the dicer... 586 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:39,280 He bought the slicer and the dicer... 587 00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:39,320 ..the Ginsu knives, the abs roller, the juicer. 588 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:43,880 ..the Ginsu knives, the abs roller, the juicer. 589 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:43,920 The 'Top 100 Hits of the '60s' - not available at any store. 590 00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:47,800 The 'Top 100 Hits of the '60s' - not available at any store. 591 00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:49,320 In short, every lie, every con... 592 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:53,040 In short, every lie, every con... 593 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:53,080 ..every...colour, shape and size of bullshit 594 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:57,960 ..every...colour, shape and size of bullshit 595 00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:58,000 the straight world has to offer. 596 00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,720 the straight world has to offer. 597 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:01,000 He fell in love. 598 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:02,520 He fell in love. 599 00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:03,880 He got married. 600 00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:05,320 He got married. 601 00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:08,400 He got a family. 602 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:10,480 He got a family. 603 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:10,520 You know - 604 00:16:10,520 --> 00:16:12,000 You know - 605 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:12,040 everything he's ever wanted since he was a kid. 606 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,480 everything he's ever wanted since he was a kid. 607 00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:15,880 A normal home. (Laughs) 608 00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:19,040 A normal home. (Laughs) 609 00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:19,080 What? (Laughs) 610 00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,960 What? (Laughs) 611 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:22,520 Why do you have such a problem with that? 612 00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:24,600 Why do you have such a problem with that? 613 00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:27,720 I'll tell you why. 614 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,160 I'll tell you why. 615 00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:30,200 You don't. 616 00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:31,920 You don't. 617 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:36,160 Your problem is... 618 00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:37,880 Your problem is... 619 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:40,640 ..he left you. 620 00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:42,200 ..he left you. 621 00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:45,760 He left you and he moved on. 622 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:47,760 He left you and he moved on. 623 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:51,760 Only he didn't. 624 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,200 Only he didn't. 625 00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:56,200 You and he just made different choices, that's all. 626 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:58,600 You and he just made different choices, that's all. 627 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:00,120 Doesn't mean that you don't still love each other. 628 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:02,600 Doesn't mean that you don't still love each other. 629 00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:05,960 He won't talk to me. 630 00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:07,480 He won't talk to me. 631 00:17:09,040 --> 00:17:09,080 Then you talk to him. 632 00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,680 Then you talk to him. 633 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:17,840 The money behind it is unbelievable. 634 00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:20,040 The money behind it is unbelievable. 635 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:20,080 Not just wealthy conservatives, but big corporations. 636 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:23,480 Not just wealthy conservatives, but big corporations. 637 00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:23,520 Ben says we should boycott them. 638 00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,360 Ben says we should boycott them. 639 00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:25,400 Yeah, before they take that right away from us too. 640 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:27,640 Yeah, before they take that right away from us too. 641 00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:27,680 Sorry to sound like such an alarmist, 642 00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,960 Sorry to sound like such an alarmist, 643 00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:30,040 but these days I feel like I'm living in Nazi Germany. 644 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,280 but these days I feel like I'm living in Nazi Germany. 645 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:32,320 Like we're the new Jews. Oh, come on, Mel. 646 00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:34,080 Like we're the new Jews. Oh, come on, Mel. 647 00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:34,120 Don't you think that's going a bit far? 648 00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,640 Don't you think that's going a bit far? 649 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:35,680 Listen, my seide - my grandfather - 650 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:37,360 Listen, my seide - my grandfather - 651 00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:37,400 used to tell me everybody thought he was nuts for leaving Germany. 652 00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:39,880 used to tell me everybody thought he was nuts for leaving Germany. 653 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:39,920 (Yiddish accent) "You're making too much of it. 654 00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:41,640 (Yiddish accent) "You're making too much of it. 655 00:17:41,640 --> 00:17:41,680 "It'll pass. That'll never happen here." 656 00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:43,280 "It'll pass. That'll never happen here." 657 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:43,320 He died at the age of 87. 658 00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:45,600 He died at the age of 87. 659 00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:45,640 The rest of his family died in camps. 660 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,320 The rest of his family died in camps. 661 00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:48,360 Well, what are we supposed to do - pack up and move to Paris? 662 00:17:48,360 --> 00:17:51,080 Well, what are we supposed to do - pack up and move to Paris? 663 00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:51,120 Well, last time I heard, they had a gay mayor. 664 00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:53,320 Well, last time I heard, they had a gay mayor. 665 00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:53,360 Listen, I'm going to grab this cab. 666 00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:55,360 Listen, I'm going to grab this cab. 667 00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:55,400 OK. Oh! (Laughs) 668 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:57,880 OK. Oh! (Laughs) 669 00:17:57,880 --> 00:17:57,920 Aw! 'Bye, sweetheart. Oh, Mel! 670 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,440 Aw! 'Bye, sweetheart. Oh, Mel! 671 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:00,480 I meant her. You too! 672 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,080 I meant her. You too! 673 00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:04,880 Can you take me to, er... 674 00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:06,840 Can you take me to, er... 675 00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:11,760 ALARM RINGS 676 00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:14,720 ALARM RINGS 677 00:19:01,120 --> 00:19:01,160 Nothing was stolen? 678 00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:03,080 Nothing was stolen? 679 00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:03,120 Not that I can tell. 680 00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:04,640 Not that I can tell. 681 00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:04,680 All I can say is thank God no-one was hurt. 682 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:07,200 All I can say is thank God no-one was hurt. 683 00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:08,320 I'll need you to file a report. 684 00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:10,200 I'll need you to file a report. 685 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:10,240 Then what? We'll investigate. 686 00:19:10,240 --> 00:19:12,160 Then what? We'll investigate. 687 00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:12,200 But with this kind of vandalism, 688 00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:13,880 But with this kind of vandalism, 689 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:13,920 it's usually pretty difficult to come up with anything. 690 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:15,880 it's usually pretty difficult to come up with anything. 691 00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:15,920 That's all you think it was - vandalism? 692 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:18,000 That's all you think it was - vandalism? 693 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:18,040 Well, what else? Probably just some kid trying to steal a comic book. 694 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:20,960 Well, what else? Probably just some kid trying to steal a comic book. 695 00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:21,000 What if it wasn't? 696 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,680 What if it wasn't? 697 00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:22,720 What if they were trying to destroy that - 698 00:19:22,720 --> 00:19:24,680 What if they were trying to destroy that - 699 00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:24,720 two gay superheroes getting married? 700 00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:27,440 two gay superheroes getting married? 701 00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:27,480 Look, I know what you're suggesting, 702 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:29,320 Look, I know what you're suggesting, 703 00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:29,360 but there's no evidence of any hate crime. 704 00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:31,360 but there's no evidence of any hate crime. 705 00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:31,400 Hate crime? 706 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:32,840 Hate crime? 707 00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:32,880 I appreciate your concern, 708 00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:34,440 I appreciate your concern, 709 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:34,480 but in all honesty, I think you're getting a bit carried away. 710 00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:38,400 but in all honesty, I think you're getting a bit carried away. 711 00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:38,440 That's funny. 712 00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,000 That's funny. 713 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:40,040 I just accused Mel of the same thing. 714 00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:42,120 I just accused Mel of the same thing. 715 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:45,480 Remember, men, a smartly folded napkin 716 00:19:45,480 --> 00:19:48,320 Remember, men, a smartly folded napkin 717 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:48,360 will add a touch of class to your table setting 718 00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:50,320 will add a touch of class to your table setting 719 00:19:50,320 --> 00:19:50,360 and be certain to charm your lady friend. 720 00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:52,880 and be certain to charm your lady friend. 721 00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:52,920 And who knows? 722 00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:54,400 And who knows? 723 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:54,440 After dinner she might even... let you... 724 00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,120 After dinner she might even... let you... 725 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:57,160 ..show her how to make one of these. 726 00:19:57,160 --> 00:19:59,280 ..show her how to make one of these. 727 00:19:59,280 --> 00:19:59,320 I'm Emmett Honeycutt, your Queer Guy, here to make your life more fabulous. 728 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:03,680 I'm Emmett Honeycutt, your Queer Guy, here to make your life more fabulous. 729 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:05,040 Thanks, Queer Guy, and that's the news. 730 00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,960 Thanks, Queer Guy, and that's the news. 731 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:07,000 We'll see you tomorrow at six. 732 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:08,800 We'll see you tomorrow at six. 733 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:08,840 Until then, hope all your news is good news. 734 00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:11,800 Until then, hope all your news is good news. 735 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:13,040 MAN: And we're out. 736 00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,760 MAN: And we're out. 737 00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:16,960 Cute segment, Emmett. 738 00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,480 Cute segment, Emmett. 739 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:18,520 By the way, I've got some good news for you. 740 00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:20,480 By the way, I've got some good news for you. 741 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:20,520 Management is thinking about doing a Queer Guy special. 742 00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:23,520 Management is thinking about doing a Queer Guy special. 743 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:23,560 Now, here's the concept. 744 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,000 Now, here's the concept. 745 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:25,040 You prepare and serve a gourmet dinner to a hot straight couple. 746 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:28,920 You prepare and serve a gourmet dinner to a hot straight couple. 747 00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:28,960 Oh...perfect. 748 00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:30,840 Oh...perfect. 749 00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:30,880 And after, they can fuck while I do the dishes. 750 00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:33,320 And after, they can fuck while I do the dishes. 751 00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:33,360 (Laughs) 752 00:20:33,360 --> 00:20:34,920 (Laughs) 753 00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:34,960 Hey, Don? You wouldn't believe who I just spoke to. 754 00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:37,360 Hey, Don? You wouldn't believe who I just spoke to. 755 00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:37,400 Who? Drew Boyd. 756 00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:38,880 Who? Drew Boyd. 757 00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:38,920 He wants to give me an exclusive interview 758 00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:40,760 He wants to give me an exclusive interview 759 00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:40,800 about the allegations that he's a fag. 760 00:20:40,800 --> 00:20:42,560 about the allegations that he's a fag. 761 00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:42,600 Jesus Christ! Our ratings are going to go through the roof. 762 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,760 Jesus Christ! Our ratings are going to go through the roof. 763 00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:44,800 Watch out, Channel Seven! Man, they'll be yesterday's news. 764 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,920 Watch out, Channel Seven! Man, they'll be yesterday's news. 765 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:08,240 Can I get a cranberry juice and sparkling water? 766 00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:10,320 Can I get a cranberry juice and sparkling water? 767 00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:17,400 Oh! Oh, sorry. It's OK. 768 00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:19,840 Oh! Oh, sorry. It's OK. 769 00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:19,880 I'll have your sweater cleaned. 770 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:21,760 I'll have your sweater cleaned. 771 00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:21,800 Don't worry about the sweater. 772 00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:23,200 Don't worry about the sweater. 773 00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:24,920 I'll have another drink, though. 774 00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:26,440 I'll have another drink, though. 775 00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:26,480 Yeah, yeah. Of course, of course. Er...what were you...? 776 00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:28,240 Yeah, yeah. Of course, of course. Er...what were you...? 777 00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:28,280 Diet Pepsi. 778 00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:29,720 Diet Pepsi. 779 00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:29,760 You don't drink? 780 00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:31,360 You don't drink? 781 00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:31,400 Maybe a glass of wine on occasion - holidays - but that's about it. 782 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:35,320 Maybe a glass of wine on occasion - holidays - but that's about it. 783 00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:37,000 Uh...Ted Schmidt. Shalom. 784 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,160 Uh...Ted Schmidt. Shalom. 785 00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:39,200 Adam Bernstein. Shalom. 786 00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:41,600 Adam Bernstein. Shalom. 787 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:41,640 And, uh...nice to meet you too. 788 00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:43,520 And, uh...nice to meet you too. 789 00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:45,240 So, what do you do for a living? 790 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,080 So, what do you do for a living? 791 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:47,120 Well, I work at this ad agency. 792 00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:49,320 Well, I work at this ad agency. 793 00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:49,360 I do a lot of things, but mostly I'm an accountant. 794 00:21:49,360 --> 00:21:51,600 I do a lot of things, but mostly I'm an accountant. 795 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:51,640 An accountant? My brother's an accountant. 796 00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,080 An accountant? My brother's an accountant. 797 00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:54,120 Maybe you've heard of him. Mark Bernstein. 798 00:21:54,120 --> 00:21:57,000 Maybe you've heard of him. Mark Bernstein. 799 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:57,040 Yeah, I think I know several. (Chuckles) 800 00:21:57,040 --> 00:22:00,000 Yeah, I think I know several. (Chuckles) 801 00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:00,040 What about you? Neurologist. 802 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:02,240 What about you? Neurologist. 803 00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:02,280 A doctor! 804 00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:03,800 A doctor! 805 00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:03,840 Well. My mother would be thrilled. 806 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,840 Well. My mother would be thrilled. 807 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:07,960 So, uh...what else do you do? 808 00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:10,040 So, uh...what else do you do? 809 00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:10,080 I mean, besides examining guy's prostates? 810 00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:12,400 I mean, besides examining guy's prostates? 811 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:14,600 I'm a tennis freak. I mean, I got a hell of a backhand. 812 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:17,760 I'm a tennis freak. I mean, I got a hell of a backhand. 813 00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:17,800 I'll bet you do. 814 00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:19,240 I'll bet you do. 815 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:19,280 Do you like opera? 816 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,120 Do you like opera? 817 00:22:21,120 --> 00:22:21,160 I hate it. 818 00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:23,080 I hate it. 819 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:23,120 But I love ballet. 820 00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:25,600 But I love ballet. 821 00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:25,640 Men in tights - how can you go wrong, right? 822 00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:28,240 Men in tights - how can you go wrong, right? 823 00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:28,280 Right. I got season's tickets. 824 00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:31,600 Right. I got season's tickets. 825 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:31,640 What do you say we go sometime? 826 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:33,360 What do you say we go sometime? 827 00:22:33,360 --> 00:22:33,400 You mean a pas de deux? I'd love to. 828 00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:36,360 You mean a pas de deux? I'd love to. 829 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:37,440 But then...why wait until 'Giselle' rolls into town? 830 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:40,520 But then...why wait until 'Giselle' rolls into town? 831 00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:42,120 Huh? 832 00:22:42,120 --> 00:22:43,600 Huh? 833 00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:48,320 Hey, I just put one of those on the front lawn. 834 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:50,760 Hey, I just put one of those on the front lawn. 835 00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:50,800 Yeah, and I just took it out. 836 00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,840 Yeah, and I just took it out. 837 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:54,040 What? 838 00:22:54,040 --> 00:22:55,560 What? 839 00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:55,600 Aren't we doing enough? Canvassing and volunteering? 840 00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:59,160 Aren't we doing enough? Canvassing and volunteering? 841 00:22:59,160 --> 00:22:59,200 Do we really need this too? 842 00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:00,760 Do we really need this too? 843 00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:00,800 It's a sign of solidarity. Support. 844 00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:04,000 It's a sign of solidarity. Support. 845 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:04,040 Besides, practically everyone's house on the block has one, 846 00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:05,960 Besides, practically everyone's house on the block has one, 847 00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:06,000 including the Iamontes. 848 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:07,720 including the Iamontes. 849 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:07,760 Good for them. They can also wear pink triangles on their sleeves. 850 00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:11,120 Good for them. They can also wear pink triangles on their sleeves. 851 00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:11,160 No reason to get yourself so worked up. 852 00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:13,680 No reason to get yourself so worked up. 853 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:13,720 Actually, there is. I've already been a target. 854 00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:15,880 Actually, there is. I've already been a target. 855 00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:15,920 Carl said there's no evidence of that. 856 00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:17,840 Carl said there's no evidence of that. 857 00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:19,000 Look, I know what happened at the shop was upsetting, 858 00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:22,880 Look, I know what happened at the shop was upsetting, 859 00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:22,920 but let's try and stay level-headed. 860 00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:25,000 but let's try and stay level-headed. 861 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:25,040 Well, fine. 862 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,000 Well, fine. 863 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:27,040 We'll see how level-headed you feel 864 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,640 We'll see how level-headed you feel 865 00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:28,680 when they round us all up and take us off to the camps. 866 00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:31,200 when they round us all up and take us off to the camps. 867 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:31,240 Oh, right. 868 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,720 Oh, right. 869 00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:32,760 If you don't want it on the front lawn, 870 00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:34,480 If you don't want it on the front lawn, 871 00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:34,520 we won't put it on the front lawn. 872 00:23:34,520 --> 00:23:36,280 we won't put it on the front lawn. 873 00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:41,680 Look, I know you think I'm being ridiculous, 874 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,400 Look, I know you think I'm being ridiculous, 875 00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:44,440 but...I would hate for something terrible to happen 876 00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:48,160 but...I would hate for something terrible to happen 877 00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:48,200 just because we didn't pay attention to the warnings. 878 00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:50,400 just because we didn't pay attention to the warnings. 879 00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:52,720 We'll have more scores at 11:00, 880 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:54,720 We'll have more scores at 11:00, 881 00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:54,760 but right now we've got a special guest in the studio with us. 882 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,680 but right now we've got a special guest in the studio with us. 883 00:23:57,680 --> 00:23:57,720 Star quarterback for the Ironmen and two-time MVP Drew Boyd. 884 00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:02,560 Star quarterback for the Ironmen and two-time MVP Drew Boyd. 885 00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:02,600 Great to have you here, Drew. Thanks, Bud. 886 00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:04,560 Great to have you here, Drew. Thanks, Bud. 887 00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:04,600 Well, Drew, you'd have to be living on the moon 888 00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:06,560 Well, Drew, you'd have to be living on the moon 889 00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:06,600 not to know what's been happening with you these days. 890 00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:08,920 not to know what's been happening with you these days. 891 00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:08,960 I'm talking about these sex allegations - "Boyd likes boys." 892 00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:13,960 I'm talking about these sex allegations - "Boyd likes boys." 893 00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:14,000 Its been a very difficult time for me, Bud, as you can imagine. 894 00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,520 Its been a very difficult time for me, Bud, as you can imagine. 895 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:17,760 But I feel as though the sooner that I address this issue, 896 00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:20,360 But I feel as though the sooner that I address this issue, 897 00:24:20,360 --> 00:24:20,400 the sooner I can get on with my life. 898 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:22,160 the sooner I can get on with my life. 899 00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:22,200 Let me just say that we've known each other 900 00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,120 Let me just say that we've known each other 901 00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:24,160 for how long now - 15 years? 902 00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:25,640 for how long now - 15 years? 903 00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:25,680 Mmm. 904 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:26,600 Mmm. 905 00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:26,640 We started out playing ball together, 906 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:28,160 We started out playing ball together, 907 00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:28,200 I have always thought of you not only as an outstanding athlete 908 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:30,880 I have always thought of you not only as an outstanding athlete 909 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:30,920 but as a man's man. 910 00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:33,320 but as a man's man. 911 00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:33,360 So...why don't we put all these rumours to rest right now? 912 00:24:33,360 --> 00:24:36,480 So...why don't we put all these rumours to rest right now? 913 00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:36,520 First of all, I would like to say that most of those stories 914 00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:39,320 First of all, I would like to say that most of those stories 915 00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:39,360 are out-and-out lies - total exaggerations. 916 00:24:39,360 --> 00:24:41,960 are out-and-out lies - total exaggerations. 917 00:24:41,960 --> 00:24:42,000 I'm sure that's a relief for your millions of fans. 918 00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:45,160 I'm sure that's a relief for your millions of fans. 919 00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:45,200 But if you're asking me if I'm gay... 920 00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:48,080 But if you're asking me if I'm gay... 921 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:48,120 ..the answer is yes. 922 00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:49,760 ..the answer is yes. 923 00:24:57,920 --> 00:24:57,960 (Chuckles) I don't believe it! 924 00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:01,560 (Chuckles) I don't believe it! 925 00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:01,600 You're saying a guy like you...? 926 00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:03,040 You're saying a guy like you...? 927 00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:03,080 Yeah. A guy like me. 928 00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:05,200 Yeah. A guy like me. 929 00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:06,600 I can't even picture you kissing another guy - not like him. 930 00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:10,640 I can't even picture you kissing another guy - not like him. 931 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:11,840 Excuse me?! 932 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:13,440 Excuse me?! 933 00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:13,480 Actually, Bud, it was your Queer Guy, Emmett Honeycutt, 934 00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:17,560 Actually, Bud, it was your Queer Guy, Emmett Honeycutt, 935 00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:17,600 who helped me to find the courage not just to be "a man's man"... 936 00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:22,240 who helped me to find the courage not just to be "a man's man"... 937 00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:22,280 ..but to be my own man. 938 00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:23,880 ..but to be my own man. 939 00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:25,280 And I'd like to thank him. 940 00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:26,880 And I'd like to thank him. 941 00:25:42,360 --> 00:25:42,400 We'll be back in a minute. 942 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:43,920 We'll be back in a minute. 943 00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:43,960 MAN: And we're out. 944 00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,400 MAN: And we're out. 945 00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:45,440 EXCITED HUBBUB 946 00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:48,400 EXCITED HUBBUB 947 00:25:54,360 --> 00:25:54,400 Justin, I'd like you to meet Simon Caswell. 948 00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,640 Justin, I'd like you to meet Simon Caswell. 949 00:25:56,640 --> 00:25:56,680 He's the critic from the 'Art Forum' magazine. 950 00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:58,360 He's the critic from the 'Art Forum' magazine. 951 00:25:58,360 --> 00:25:58,400 Hello. 952 00:25:58,400 --> 00:25:59,880 Hello. 953 00:25:59,880 --> 00:25:59,920 Lindsay is always trying to convince me to come to Pittsburgh. 954 00:25:59,920 --> 00:26:02,640 Lindsay is always trying to convince me to come to Pittsburgh. 955 00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:02,680 I tell her Warhol's it, but this time I could be wrong. 956 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:07,560 I tell her Warhol's it, but this time I could be wrong. 957 00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:11,280 Your work has a surprising intensity to it. 958 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:14,440 Your work has a surprising intensity to it. 959 00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:14,480 Especially for someone so young. 960 00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:16,080 Especially for someone so young. 961 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:16,120 What made you want to be an artist? 962 00:26:16,120 --> 00:26:17,920 What made you want to be an artist? 963 00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:17,960 It was that or be a mass murderer. 964 00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:19,800 It was that or be a mass murderer. 965 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:19,840 (Laughs) That's very amusing. 966 00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,680 (Laughs) That's very amusing. 967 00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:24,000 I'll be in touch. 968 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:25,600 I'll be in touch. 969 00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:27,480 Did you hear what he said? 970 00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,320 Did you hear what he said? 971 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:29,360 Remember this moment. 972 00:26:29,360 --> 00:26:31,000 Remember this moment. 973 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:31,040 What for? He's a cunt. 974 00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:32,880 What for? He's a cunt. 975 00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:32,920 A very influential cunt. A cunt's a cunt. 976 00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:35,200 A very influential cunt. A cunt's a cunt. 977 00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:36,640 From the way everyone's talking, 978 00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:38,160 From the way everyone's talking, 979 00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:38,200 this might as well be a one-man show. 980 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:39,920 this might as well be a one-man show. 981 00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:39,960 I had no idea you were so talented. 982 00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:41,720 I had no idea you were so talented. 983 00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:41,760 Thank you. 984 00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:43,200 Thank you. 985 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:43,240 Corinne, you remember... Lindsay. 986 00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:44,640 Corinne, you remember... Lindsay. 987 00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:44,680 I'm really enjoying the show. 988 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:46,320 I'm really enjoying the show. 989 00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:46,360 I'm delighted you could come. 990 00:26:46,360 --> 00:26:47,840 I'm delighted you could come. 991 00:26:47,840 --> 00:26:47,880 I need a refill. Catch you later. 'Bye. 992 00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:51,080 I need a refill. Catch you later. 'Bye. 993 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:53,360 Are you sure you're OK with all of this? 994 00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:55,160 Are you sure you're OK with all of this? 995 00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:55,200 Well, what other choice do I have? My other career choice. 996 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,880 Well, what other choice do I have? My other career choice. 997 00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:00,800 Art openings are always such gay occasions. 998 00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:04,400 Art openings are always such gay occasions. 999 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:04,440 Mmm. Especially now that you're here. 1000 00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:06,480 Mmm. Especially now that you're here. 1001 00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:08,680 I wasn't sure you'd come. Neither was I. 1002 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:10,640 I wasn't sure you'd come. Neither was I. 1003 00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:12,640 That it? Do you like it? 1004 00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:15,160 That it? Do you like it? 1005 00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:15,200 If I did, would that make it good? 1006 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,560 If I did, would that make it good? 1007 00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:17,600 No. 1008 00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:18,680 No. 1009 00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:18,720 Would it make you like it more or less? 1010 00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,160 Would it make you like it more or less? 1011 00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:21,200 No. Would it make you rich? 1012 00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:22,880 No. Would it make you rich? 1013 00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:22,920 No. 1014 00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:24,080 No. 1015 00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:24,120 Then why do you give a shit what I think? 1016 00:27:24,120 --> 00:27:26,120 Then why do you give a shit what I think? 1017 00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:29,360 I think it's exquisite. 1018 00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:30,800 I think it's exquisite. 1019 00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:32,760 You should be very proud. 1020 00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:34,400 You should be very proud. 1021 00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:38,360 It's been a long time since I fucked an artsy type. 1022 00:27:38,360 --> 00:27:40,760 It's been a long time since I fucked an artsy type. 1023 00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:52,240 Let me guess. 1024 00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:54,400 Let me guess. 1025 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:54,440 You don't know art, but you know what you like? 1026 00:27:54,440 --> 00:27:56,800 You don't know art, but you know what you like? 1027 00:27:58,600 --> 00:27:58,640 I like Magritte, Cezanne and Johns. 1028 00:27:58,640 --> 00:28:01,960 I like Magritte, Cezanne and Johns. 1029 00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:02,000 Hmm. 1030 00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:03,960 Hmm. 1031 00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:04,000 I did go to college. 1032 00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:05,720 I did go to college. 1033 00:28:07,200 --> 00:28:07,240 And I also like your stuff. 1034 00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:08,720 And I also like your stuff. 1035 00:28:08,720 --> 00:28:08,760 You also like my mother. 1036 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:11,000 You also like my mother. 1037 00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:11,040 Yes, I do. 1038 00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:12,840 Yes, I do. 1039 00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:12,880 Don't you have one of your own? 1040 00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:14,480 Don't you have one of your own? 1041 00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:17,160 That's not why I like her. 1042 00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:18,840 That's not why I like her. 1043 00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:18,880 I like her because she's... 1044 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:21,800 I like her because she's... 1045 00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:21,840 ..beautiful... (Sighs) 1046 00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:23,720 ..beautiful... (Sighs) 1047 00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:23,760 ..intelligent, sexy. 1048 00:28:23,760 --> 00:28:25,600 ..intelligent, sexy. 1049 00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:25,640 Have you fucked her? 1050 00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:27,040 Have you fucked her? 1051 00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:28,600 I don't think that concerns you. 1052 00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:30,520 I don't think that concerns you. 1053 00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:30,560 As they say, 25 goes into 50 a lot more than 50 goes into 25. 1054 00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:34,040 As they say, 25 goes into 50 a lot more than 50 goes into 25. 1055 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:34,080 Except in your case. 1056 00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:35,840 Except in your case. 1057 00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:35,880 (Chuckles) 1058 00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:37,600 (Chuckles) 1059 00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:37,640 Although to be fair, he's not quite that old, is he? 1060 00:28:37,640 --> 00:28:39,960 Although to be fair, he's not quite that old, is he? 1061 00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:45,400 She's an adult. So am I. 1062 00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,160 She's an adult. So am I. 1063 00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:47,200 She's free to love whoever she pleases 1064 00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:49,160 She's free to love whoever she pleases 1065 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:49,200 without her child's approval. 1066 00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:50,720 without her child's approval. 1067 00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:50,760 I'm her son. And I'm an adult. 1068 00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:54,040 I'm her son. And I'm an adult. 1069 00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:54,080 OK. Then act like one. 1070 00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:55,960 OK. Then act like one. 1071 00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:01,320 Who knew there were so many hot Jewish men in the world? 1072 00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:03,720 Who knew there were so many hot Jewish men in the world? 1073 00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:03,760 Jesus Christ! You already sound like Yentl. 1074 00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:06,400 Jesus Christ! You already sound like Yentl. 1075 00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:06,440 Dr and Mrs Adam Bernstein. How's that sound? 1076 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:10,320 Dr and Mrs Adam Bernstein. How's that sound? 1077 00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:10,360 Mazel tov. 1078 00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:12,240 Mazel tov. 1079 00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:12,280 Can I borrow you for a moment? 1080 00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:13,960 Can I borrow you for a moment? 1081 00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:14,000 I was in the middle of a conversation. 1082 00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:15,560 I was in the middle of a conversation. 1083 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:15,600 Yeah, well, Theodore can regale you with his tales of the yeshiva later. 1084 00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:19,440 Yeah, well, Theodore can regale you with his tales of the yeshiva later. 1085 00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:23,320 Well, what is it? 1086 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:24,880 Well, what is it? 1087 00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:26,400 I just wanted you to know 1088 00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:27,920 I just wanted you to know 1089 00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:27,960 that if it makes you happy being a Stepford fag, 1090 00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:31,800 that if it makes you happy being a Stepford fag, 1091 00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:31,840 then I say...go for it. 1092 00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,120 then I say...go for it. 1093 00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:36,240 Be the biggest Stepford fag in the world. It's fine with me. 1094 00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:38,920 Be the biggest Stepford fag in the world. It's fine with me. 1095 00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:42,640 What's that supposed to be, an apology? 1096 00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:44,560 What's that supposed to be, an apology? 1097 00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:46,120 I mean it. 1098 00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:47,640 I mean it. 1099 00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:47,680 Aren't you afraid I'm going to infect you? 1100 00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:49,240 Aren't you afraid I'm going to infect you? 1101 00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:52,640 Look, just because we've been friends our whole lives 1102 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:54,960 Look, just because we've been friends our whole lives 1103 00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:55,000 doesn't mean we have to stay friends. 1104 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:56,480 doesn't mean we have to stay friends. 1105 00:29:59,680 --> 00:29:59,720 Especially since we no longer have anything in common. 1106 00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:03,400 Especially since we no longer have anything in common. 1107 00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:05,160 So, why don't we just admit that the Brian and Mikey Show is over 1108 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:09,080 So, why don't we just admit that the Brian and Mikey Show is over 1109 00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:09,120 and get on with our lives? 1110 00:30:09,120 --> 00:30:10,760 and get on with our lives? 1111 00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:24,680 Scotch? 1112 00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:26,720 Scotch? 1113 00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:26,760 Well, I don't usually like my drinks straight, but... 1114 00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:29,520 Well, I don't usually like my drinks straight, but... 1115 00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:31,600 Sorry I got you fired. 1116 00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:33,200 Sorry I got you fired. 1117 00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:33,240 Hmm...I may have lost my job, 1118 00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:35,880 Hmm...I may have lost my job, 1119 00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:35,920 but after our screen kiss, 1120 00:30:35,920 --> 00:30:38,160 but after our screen kiss, 1121 00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:38,200 at least no-one can say I'm sexless. 1122 00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:40,080 at least no-one can say I'm sexless. 1123 00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:40,120 (Chuckles) Thanks to me. 1124 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:42,880 (Chuckles) Thanks to me. 1125 00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:42,920 Yeah! Whatever possessed you? 1126 00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:45,720 Yeah! Whatever possessed you? 1127 00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:48,200 It's the first rule of the game. 1128 00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:49,880 It's the first rule of the game. 1129 00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:49,920 Always protect your team-mates. 1130 00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,360 Always protect your team-mates. 1131 00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:52,400 And since we now play for the same team, 1132 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:54,600 And since we now play for the same team, 1133 00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:54,640 I was covering your ass. 1134 00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:56,400 I was covering your ass. 1135 00:30:57,600 --> 00:30:57,640 And paying back Raymond Oswald. 1136 00:30:57,640 --> 00:30:59,520 And paying back Raymond Oswald. 1137 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:01,840 He was this kid in high school. 1138 00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:03,440 He was this kid in high school. 1139 00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:03,480 Effeminate. Total fag. 1140 00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:05,280 Effeminate. Total fag. 1141 00:31:05,280 --> 00:31:05,320 I know the type. (Chuckles) 1142 00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:07,000 I know the type. (Chuckles) 1143 00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:08,440 My buddies and I made his life miserable. 1144 00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:11,640 My buddies and I made his life miserable. 1145 00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:11,680 Taunted him. Beat him until he cried. 1146 00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:15,560 Taunted him. Beat him until he cried. 1147 00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:16,880 He finally transferred to another school. 1148 00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:18,640 He finally transferred to another school. 1149 00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:19,760 I always felt... 1150 00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:21,360 I always felt... 1151 00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:21,400 ..awful... 1152 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:24,240 ..awful... 1153 00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:24,280 ..for what I did to him. 1154 00:31:24,280 --> 00:31:27,080 ..for what I did to him. 1155 00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:27,120 Because secretly I knew, 1156 00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:29,240 Because secretly I knew, 1157 00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:29,280 even though he and I may have been different on the outside, 1158 00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:32,480 even though he and I may have been different on the outside, 1159 00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:32,520 on the inside, we were the same. 1160 00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:34,480 on the inside, we were the same. 1161 00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:36,840 So I guess you could say you're my atonement 1162 00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:40,000 So I guess you could say you're my atonement 1163 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:40,040 for what I did to Raymond Oswald. 1164 00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:41,720 for what I did to Raymond Oswald. 1165 00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:46,560 My hero. 1166 00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:48,120 My hero. 1167 00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:52,400 So, now that you're finally out, how do you feel? 1168 00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:55,480 So, now that you're finally out, how do you feel? 1169 00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:00,520 Horny. 1170 00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:01,960 Horny. 1171 00:32:08,080 --> 00:32:08,120 Oh! 1172 00:32:08,120 --> 00:32:09,720 Oh! 1173 00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:21,680 (Emmett laughs) 1174 00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:23,480 (Emmett laughs) 1175 00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:27,760 I love football! 1176 00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:29,600 I love football! 1177 00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:47,080 (Gasps) SHIT! 1178 00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:49,480 (Gasps) SHIT! 1179 00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:49,520 You want to wake the children? 1180 00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:51,360 You want to wake the children? 1181 00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:51,400 (Laughs) I'm sure I woke the dead. 1182 00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:53,200 (Laughs) I'm sure I woke the dead. 1183 00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:53,240 You scared the fucking crap out of me! 1184 00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:56,120 You scared the fucking crap out of me! 1185 00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:56,160 Sorry. 1186 00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:57,720 Sorry. 1187 00:32:57,720 --> 00:32:57,760 What are you, uh, sitting in the dark for? 1188 00:32:57,760 --> 00:33:00,960 What are you, uh, sitting in the dark for? 1189 00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:01,000 I felt like it. 1190 00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:02,560 I felt like it. 1191 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:21,000 Any more cocoa? I just made enough for me. 1192 00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,360 Any more cocoa? I just made enough for me. 1193 00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:24,800 It's after 3:00. 1194 00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:26,440 It's after 3:00. 1195 00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:26,480 Yeah, I got tied up. 1196 00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:28,320 Yeah, I got tied up. 1197 00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:28,360 Oh. Satin or leather? 1198 00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:30,080 Oh. Satin or leather? 1199 00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:30,120 Talking. 1200 00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:31,720 Talking. 1201 00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:34,160 I don't need to explain, make excuses or apologise. 1202 00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:37,080 I don't need to explain, make excuses or apologise. 1203 00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:37,120 Those are the rules. 1204 00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:38,680 Those are the rules. 1205 00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:38,720 That we both agreed to. Did you forget you had a family? 1206 00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:41,240 That we both agreed to. Did you forget you had a family? 1207 00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:41,280 Well...you're here. 1208 00:33:41,280 --> 00:33:43,360 Well...you're here. 1209 00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:43,400 I came home right after the show. 1210 00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:45,160 I came home right after the show. 1211 00:33:45,160 --> 00:33:45,200 Which was great, by the way. We both enjoyed it. 1212 00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:47,880 Which was great, by the way. We both enjoyed it. 1213 00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:49,040 I'm so glad. 1214 00:33:49,040 --> 00:33:51,400 I'm so glad. 1215 00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:51,440 Listen, next time I promise I'll call, OK? 1216 00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:53,960 Listen, next time I promise I'll call, OK? 1217 00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:56,080 I wouldn't worry about next time. 1218 00:33:56,080 --> 00:33:57,960 I wouldn't worry about next time. 1219 00:33:59,080 --> 00:33:59,120 This whole in-house separation isn't working. At least, not for me. 1220 00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:02,560 This whole in-house separation isn't working. At least, not for me. 1221 00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:02,600 It's for people who are obviously more sophisticated - 1222 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:05,600 It's for people who are obviously more sophisticated - 1223 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:05,640 or heartless - than I am. 1224 00:34:05,640 --> 00:34:07,200 or heartless - than I am. 1225 00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:08,720 So, what do you suggest? 1226 00:34:08,720 --> 00:34:10,640 So, what do you suggest? 1227 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:13,320 That we sell the house. 1228 00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:15,000 That we sell the house. 1229 00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:15,040 Get two separate places. 1230 00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:16,840 Get two separate places. 1231 00:34:16,840 --> 00:34:16,880 Sell the house? 1232 00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:18,360 Sell the house? 1233 00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:18,400 Why should you live here while I'm in some crummy apartment? 1234 00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,760 Why should you live here while I'm in some crummy apartment? 1235 00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:20,800 We're not selling the house. Then YOU move out. 1236 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:24,320 We're not selling the house. Then YOU move out. 1237 00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:26,440 Fine. You want to sell the house? 1238 00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:28,440 Fine. You want to sell the house? 1239 00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:28,480 Divide everything up fifty-fifty? 1240 00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:30,000 Divide everything up fifty-fifty? 1241 00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:31,800 What about this vase? Don't make fun of me. 1242 00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:34,440 What about this vase? Don't make fun of me. 1243 00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:34,480 Who was making fun? It's yours. 1244 00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:36,800 Who was making fun? It's yours. 1245 00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:36,840 You sure? I gave it to you. 1246 00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:39,200 You sure? I gave it to you. 1247 00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:39,240 Remember? For one of our anniversaries? 1248 00:34:39,240 --> 00:34:41,960 Remember? For one of our anniversaries? 1249 00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:42,000 Well, I don't want it. 1250 00:34:42,000 --> 00:34:43,560 Well, I don't want it. 1251 00:34:43,560 --> 00:34:43,600 Yeah? Neither do I. 1252 00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,160 Yeah? Neither do I. 1253 00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:48,560 Why did you do that? One less thing to wrap and move. 1254 00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:51,440 Why did you do that? One less thing to wrap and move. 1255 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:52,920 Then why don't we get rid of...this? 1256 00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:56,520 Then why don't we get rid of...this? 1257 00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:56,560 That's my mother's Depressionware candy dish. 1258 00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:58,480 That's my mother's Depressionware candy dish. 1259 00:34:58,480 --> 00:34:58,520 It's about to get more depressed. 1260 00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:00,440 It's about to get more depressed. 1261 00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:00,480 You... Give it to me! 1262 00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:02,080 You... Give it to me! 1263 00:35:02,080 --> 00:35:02,120 Hands off me! 1264 00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:03,880 Hands off me! 1265 00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:03,920 SMASH! 1266 00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:05,640 SMASH! 1267 00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:05,680 Goddamn you! Goddamn you! 1268 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:08,000 Goddamn you! Goddamn you! 1269 00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:08,040 (Both grunt) 1270 00:35:08,040 --> 00:35:09,960 (Both grunt) 1271 00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:18,960 You bitch! 1272 00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:21,320 You bitch! 1273 00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:21,360 Oh! Arggh! 1274 00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:22,880 Oh! Arggh! 1275 00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:22,920 (Both grunt) 1276 00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:24,800 (Both grunt) 1277 00:35:39,960 --> 00:35:40,000 Oh...oh! Oh! 1278 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:43,000 Oh...oh! Oh! 1279 00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:43,040 Oh...oh! (Breathes heavily) 1280 00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,920 Oh...oh! (Breathes heavily) 1281 00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:51,560 (Both moan ecstatically) 1282 00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:54,520 (Both moan ecstatically) 1283 00:35:59,480 --> 00:35:59,520 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! 1284 00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:02,480 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! 1285 00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:02,520 (Both grunt with exertion) 1286 00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:05,440 (Both grunt with exertion) 1287 00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:10,240 (Breathes heavily) (Moans) 1288 00:36:10,240 --> 00:36:13,160 (Breathes heavily) (Moans) 1289 00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:19,440 I don't care if you're the next Picasso. 1290 00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:21,680 I don't care if you're the next Picasso. 1291 00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:21,720 That does not give you the right to be rude. 1292 00:36:21,720 --> 00:36:24,040 That does not give you the right to be rude. 1293 00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:24,080 How was I rude? 1294 00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:26,000 How was I rude? 1295 00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:26,040 I only asked him a few questions. 1296 00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:28,280 I only asked him a few questions. 1297 00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:28,320 Like if he's fucking me?! 1298 00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:30,080 Like if he's fucking me?! 1299 00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:30,120 More coffee? No, thank you. 1300 00:36:30,120 --> 00:36:31,760 More coffee? No, thank you. 1301 00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:31,800 I'll have some. 1302 00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:33,200 I'll have some. 1303 00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:34,920 Thank you. 1304 00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:36,400 Thank you. 1305 00:36:36,400 --> 00:36:36,440 What kind of a question was that? 1306 00:36:36,440 --> 00:36:38,960 What kind of a question was that? 1307 00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:39,000 I was merely looking out for your best interests. 1308 00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:41,000 I was merely looking out for your best interests. 1309 00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:42,800 You don't think that maybe you were feeling threatened 1310 00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:46,320 You don't think that maybe you were feeling threatened 1311 00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:46,360 because there's another man in my life? 1312 00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:48,160 because there's another man in my life? 1313 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:48,200 I was not feeling threatened. 1314 00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:49,720 I was not feeling threatened. 1315 00:36:49,720 --> 00:36:49,760 Honey, Tucker is the first man I've gone out with 1316 00:36:49,760 --> 00:36:53,360 Honey, Tucker is the first man I've gone out with 1317 00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:53,400 since your father left me. 1318 00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:54,840 since your father left me. 1319 00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:54,880 That's a long time. 1320 00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:56,640 That's a long time. 1321 00:36:57,680 --> 00:36:57,720 Don't you think I'm entitled to be with someone? 1322 00:36:57,720 --> 00:36:59,880 Don't you think I'm entitled to be with someone? 1323 00:36:59,880 --> 00:36:59,920 Someone appropriate. 1324 00:36:59,920 --> 00:37:01,360 Someone appropriate. 1325 00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:01,400 Someone your own age. 1326 00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:02,880 Someone your own age. 1327 00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:02,920 Oh! That's really funny, coming from you. 1328 00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:06,720 Oh! That's really funny, coming from you. 1329 00:37:06,720 --> 00:37:06,760 Mom, I was 17. 1330 00:37:06,760 --> 00:37:08,960 Mom, I was 17. 1331 00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:09,000 You're... 1332 00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:10,800 You're... 1333 00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:10,840 You're my mother. You should know better. 1334 00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:12,920 You're my mother. You should know better. 1335 00:37:15,640 --> 00:37:15,680 You know, when you first started seeing Brian, 1336 00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:19,280 You know, when you first started seeing Brian, 1337 00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:19,320 I admit I had trouble - a lot of trouble. 1338 00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,920 I admit I had trouble - a lot of trouble. 1339 00:37:23,120 --> 00:37:23,160 But eventually I realised 1340 00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:25,120 But eventually I realised 1341 00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:25,160 that if he made you happy, was good to you, 1342 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:28,480 that if he made you happy, was good to you, 1343 00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:28,520 that's all that really mattered. 1344 00:37:28,520 --> 00:37:30,200 that's all that really mattered. 1345 00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:31,960 Well, now it's your turn. Hmm? 1346 00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:34,840 Well, now it's your turn. Hmm? 1347 00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:39,640 MAN: This is not a time for complacency or silence. 1348 00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:43,160 MAN: This is not a time for complacency or silence. 1349 00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:43,200 The battle lines have been drawn. 1350 00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:44,800 The battle lines have been drawn. 1351 00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:44,840 It's up to every American to declare which side they're on. 1352 00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:47,320 It's up to every American to declare which side they're on. 1353 00:37:47,320 --> 00:37:47,360 The side that recognises homosexuality 1354 00:37:47,360 --> 00:37:49,720 The side that recognises homosexuality 1355 00:37:49,720 --> 00:37:49,760 as an acceptable lifestyle 1356 00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:51,360 as an acceptable lifestyle 1357 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:51,400 and wants to reward their deviant behaviour 1358 00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:54,080 and wants to reward their deviant behaviour 1359 00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:54,120 by giving them the most sacred right that a man and woman have - 1360 00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:56,680 by giving them the most sacred right that a man and woman have - 1361 00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:56,720 the right to marry... 1362 00:37:56,720 --> 00:37:58,120 the right to marry... 1363 00:37:58,120 --> 00:37:58,160 Do you hear what he's saying? 1364 00:37:58,160 --> 00:37:59,640 Do you hear what he's saying? 1365 00:37:59,640 --> 00:37:59,680 ..or the side that is determined to uphold the values 1366 00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:01,720 ..or the side that is determined to uphold the values 1367 00:38:01,720 --> 00:38:01,760 on which this great Christian country was founded... 1368 00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:03,680 on which this great Christian country was founded... 1369 00:38:03,680 --> 00:38:03,720 When did we become a Christian country? 1370 00:38:03,720 --> 00:38:05,160 When did we become a Christian country? 1371 00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:05,200 ..to defend the family and to protect our children. 1372 00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:06,960 ..to defend the family and to protect our children. 1373 00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:07,000 Why do they always make it on family and children? 1374 00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:08,960 Why do they always make it on family and children? 1375 00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:09,000 Like, gay people don't have families and children, too?! 1376 00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:10,760 Like, gay people don't have families and children, too?! 1377 00:38:10,760 --> 00:38:10,800 Maybe we should punch his fucking lights out. 1378 00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:13,040 Maybe we should punch his fucking lights out. 1379 00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:13,080 That's not how we get our message across - by starting fights. 1380 00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:16,520 That's not how we get our message across - by starting fights. 1381 00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:19,240 WOMAN: Please vote for Proposition 14. 1382 00:38:19,240 --> 00:38:21,200 WOMAN: Please vote for Proposition 14. 1383 00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:24,640 I have this thing for Sichuan beef. 1384 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:26,720 I have this thing for Sichuan beef. 1385 00:38:26,720 --> 00:38:26,760 Oh, me too. Love it. 1386 00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:29,400 Oh, me too. Love it. 1387 00:38:29,400 --> 00:38:29,440 Can't get enough of it. 1388 00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,240 Can't get enough of it. 1389 00:38:31,240 --> 00:38:31,280 What else can't you get enough of? 1390 00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,160 What else can't you get enough of? 1391 00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:40,880 That. 1392 00:38:40,880 --> 00:38:42,360 That. 1393 00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:42,400 You know, I never put too much stock in those mixers at Woody's. 1394 00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:45,880 You know, I never put too much stock in those mixers at Woody's. 1395 00:38:47,120 --> 00:38:47,160 I mainly went to confirm my conviction 1396 00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:48,720 I mainly went to confirm my conviction 1397 00:38:48,720 --> 00:38:48,760 that nothing would ever come of it. 1398 00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:50,680 that nothing would ever come of it. 1399 00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:50,720 That is so pessimistic. 1400 00:38:50,720 --> 00:38:53,640 That is so pessimistic. 1401 00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:53,680 It's not pessimistic, it's, uh... it's Jewish. 1402 00:38:53,680 --> 00:38:56,160 It's not pessimistic, it's, uh... it's Jewish. 1403 00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:56,200 Huh. 1404 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:57,600 Huh. 1405 00:38:57,600 --> 00:38:57,640 But this time it worked out. 1406 00:38:57,640 --> 00:39:00,720 But this time it worked out. 1407 00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:00,760 For me too. 1408 00:39:00,760 --> 00:39:02,440 For me too. 1409 00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:05,360 Mind if I ask you a personal question? 1410 00:39:05,360 --> 00:39:07,240 Mind if I ask you a personal question? 1411 00:39:07,240 --> 00:39:07,280 Do I ever have sex on the first date? Mmm. How'd you guess? 1412 00:39:07,280 --> 00:39:10,280 Do I ever have sex on the first date? Mmm. How'd you guess? 1413 00:39:10,280 --> 00:39:10,320 Depends how it goes. 1414 00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,200 Depends how it goes. 1415 00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:12,240 How would you say this is going? 1416 00:39:12,240 --> 00:39:13,840 How would you say this is going? 1417 00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:20,720 Ah! 1418 00:39:20,720 --> 00:39:22,160 Ah! 1419 00:39:24,880 --> 00:39:24,920 (Breathes heavily) 1420 00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:27,880 (Breathes heavily) 1421 00:39:36,120 --> 00:39:36,160 Everything alright down there? 1422 00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:38,000 Everything alright down there? 1423 00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:38,040 Frankly, no. 1424 00:39:38,040 --> 00:39:39,480 Frankly, no. 1425 00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:39,520 What's wrong? 1426 00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:41,320 What's wrong? 1427 00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:42,480 You're not Jewish. 1428 00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:43,960 You're not Jewish. 1429 00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:44,000 I never said I was. 1430 00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:45,960 I never said I was. 1431 00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:46,000 But you were at the mixer. 1432 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:47,720 But you were at the mixer. 1433 00:39:47,720 --> 00:39:47,760 I wanted to meet a nice Jewish guy. 1434 00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:49,840 I wanted to meet a nice Jewish guy. 1435 00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:49,880 So did I. 1436 00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:51,360 So did I. 1437 00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:54,240 Oh...well...look, I mean... 1438 00:39:54,240 --> 00:39:56,880 Oh...well...look, I mean... 1439 00:39:56,880 --> 00:39:56,920 Why let a little thing like my not being Jewish 1440 00:39:56,920 --> 00:40:00,080 Why let a little thing like my not being Jewish 1441 00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:00,120 ruin what could be a beautiful relationship? 1442 00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:03,320 ruin what could be a beautiful relationship? 1443 00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:03,360 Because I want a Jewish husband. 1444 00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:05,280 Because I want a Jewish husband. 1445 00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:05,320 I want to settle down, carry on traditions, heritage. 1446 00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:08,440 I want to settle down, carry on traditions, heritage. 1447 00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:08,480 Well, I-I'll have the surgery. Uh...more surgery. 1448 00:40:08,480 --> 00:40:12,000 Well, I-I'll have the surgery. Uh...more surgery. 1449 00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:12,040 Uh, I'll, uh...I'll convert. 1450 00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:14,560 Uh, I'll, uh...I'll convert. 1451 00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:14,600 Huh? Elizabeth Taylor did it. Marilyn Monroe. Sammy Davis Jr... 1452 00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:18,760 Huh? Elizabeth Taylor did it. Marilyn Monroe. Sammy Davis Jr... 1453 00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:18,800 Look. 1454 00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:20,280 Look. 1455 00:40:20,280 --> 00:40:20,320 You're a nice guy, Ted. 1456 00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:22,240 You're a nice guy, Ted. 1457 00:40:22,240 --> 00:40:22,280 You're just not a nice Jewish guy. 1458 00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:24,320 You're just not a nice Jewish guy. 1459 00:40:28,480 --> 00:40:28,520 Uh... 1460 00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:29,960 Uh... 1461 00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:32,480 Hey, Deb, listen to this. 1462 00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:34,440 Hey, Deb, listen to this. 1463 00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:35,720 "And then the unthinkable happened. 1464 00:40:35,720 --> 00:40:38,200 "And then the unthinkable happened. 1465 00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:38,240 "Drew Boyd, hero to millions of fans, 1466 00:40:38,240 --> 00:40:40,800 "Drew Boyd, hero to millions of fans, 1467 00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:40,840 "planted one on Channel Five's Queer Guy. 1468 00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:43,360 "planted one on Channel Five's Queer Guy. 1469 00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:43,400 "It was the kiss heard round the world. 1470 00:40:43,400 --> 00:40:46,040 "It was the kiss heard round the world. 1471 00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:46,080 "The question is, now what? 1472 00:40:46,080 --> 00:40:48,000 "The question is, now what? 1473 00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:48,040 "Will Mr Boyd still be called a hero, 1474 00:40:48,040 --> 00:40:49,640 "Will Mr Boyd still be called a hero, 1475 00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:49,680 "or will he be called a lot of less flattering things? 1476 00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:51,960 "or will he be called a lot of less flattering things? 1477 00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:52,000 "It doesn't really matter. 1478 00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:53,480 "It doesn't really matter. 1479 00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:53,520 "What matters is Drew Boyd has scored a touchdown 1480 00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,200 "What matters is Drew Boyd has scored a touchdown 1481 00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:56,240 "for personal courage and honesty." 1482 00:40:56,240 --> 00:40:58,640 "for personal courage and honesty." 1483 00:40:58,640 --> 00:40:58,680 Yes! 1484 00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:00,600 Yes! 1485 00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:00,640 REPORTERS CLAMOUR 1486 00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:03,560 REPORTERS CLAMOUR 1487 00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:05,520 CARL: Will you let the man in through?! 1488 00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:08,320 CARL: Will you let the man in through?! 1489 00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:12,040 I'm sorry about this. It's not your fault, honey. 1490 00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:14,200 I'm sorry about this. It's not your fault, honey. 1491 00:41:15,240 --> 00:41:15,280 Do they have to trample my fucking rose bed?! 1492 00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:18,080 Do they have to trample my fucking rose bed?! 1493 00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:18,120 Well, wait till you read this. 1494 00:41:18,120 --> 00:41:20,000 Well, wait till you read this. 1495 00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:20,040 You're going to be so proud. 1496 00:41:20,040 --> 00:41:22,040 You're going to be so proud. 1497 00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:22,080 I've been suspended. 1498 00:41:22,080 --> 00:41:24,360 I've been suspended. 1499 00:41:24,360 --> 00:41:24,400 What? 1500 00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,120 What? 1501 00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:26,160 Why?! 1502 00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:27,600 Why?! 1503 00:41:27,600 --> 00:41:27,640 You weren't driving drunk. 1504 00:41:27,640 --> 00:41:29,760 You weren't driving drunk. 1505 00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:29,800 You didn't rape anybody. You weren't making illegal bets. 1506 00:41:29,800 --> 00:41:32,200 You didn't rape anybody. You weren't making illegal bets. 1507 00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:32,240 All you did was... Deb! 1508 00:41:32,240 --> 00:41:33,680 All you did was... Deb! 1509 00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:33,720 What? We know what he did. 1510 00:41:33,720 --> 00:41:35,760 What? We know what he did. 1511 00:41:40,480 --> 00:41:40,520 My coach says it's for my own good. 1512 00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:42,840 My coach says it's for my own good. 1513 00:41:44,240 --> 00:41:44,280 In case my team-mates try to injure me. 1514 00:41:44,280 --> 00:41:46,200 In case my team-mates try to injure me. 1515 00:41:47,720 --> 00:41:47,760 I thought you were supposed to look out for each other. 1516 00:41:47,760 --> 00:41:50,520 I thought you were supposed to look out for each other. 1517 00:41:52,960 --> 00:41:53,000 So did I. 1518 00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:54,680 So did I. 1519 00:42:02,040 --> 00:42:02,080 You're being awfully diligent. 1520 00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,200 You're being awfully diligent. 1521 00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:04,240 It's our home. 1522 00:42:04,240 --> 00:42:06,760 It's our home. 1523 00:42:06,760 --> 00:42:06,800 I want everything to be perfect. 1524 00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:09,720 I want everything to be perfect. 1525 00:42:09,720 --> 00:42:09,760 You're in it. That's perfect enough for me. 1526 00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:11,920 You're in it. That's perfect enough for me. 1527 00:42:13,240 --> 00:42:13,280 That is the most cloyingly sentimental remark 1528 00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:16,000 That is the most cloyingly sentimental remark 1529 00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:16,040 I have every heard. 1530 00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:17,520 I have every heard. 1531 00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:17,560 I'd throw up if I didn't love every word of it. 1532 00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:19,920 I'd throw up if I didn't love every word of it. 1533 00:42:22,680 --> 00:42:22,720 Aw. Come on in. It's cold. 1534 00:42:22,720 --> 00:42:24,760 Aw. Come on in. It's cold. 1535 00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:24,800 Wait. Hold on. 1536 00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:26,480 Wait. Hold on. 1537 00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:26,520 I've just got to do one last thing. 1538 00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:28,120 I've just got to do one last thing. 1539 00:42:37,720 --> 00:42:37,760 There. 1540 00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:39,480 There. 1541 00:44:15,440 --> 00:44:15,480 Surprised to see you here. 1542 00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:17,400 Surprised to see you here. 1543 00:44:18,400 --> 00:44:18,440 I wanted to ask you a question. 1544 00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:19,880 I wanted to ask you a question. 1545 00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:22,360 Why did you apologise? 1546 00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:24,840 Why did you apologise? 1547 00:44:24,840 --> 00:44:24,880 I guess I miss you. 1548 00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:26,920 I guess I miss you. 1549 00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:31,800 You still love me? 1550 00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,640 You still love me? 1551 00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:35,200 Always have. 1552 00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:36,640 Always have. 1553 00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:40,320 Always will. 1554 00:44:40,320 --> 00:44:41,760 Always will. 1555 00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:44,120 So do I. 1556 00:44:44,120 --> 00:44:45,760 So do I. 1557 00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:48,800 I said, you look like you need a friend to talk to. So do I. 1558 00:44:48,800 --> 00:44:51,720 I said, you look like you need a friend to talk to. So do I. 1559 00:44:53,880 --> 00:44:53,920 Is there a hotline for that? 1560 00:44:53,920 --> 00:44:55,600 Is there a hotline for that? 1561 00:44:57,200 --> 00:44:57,240 In a pinch, you'll do. 1562 00:44:57,240 --> 00:44:59,760 In a pinch, you'll do. 1563 00:44:59,760 --> 00:44:59,800 My date was a bust. 1564 00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:01,480 My date was a bust. 1565 00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:04,680 What went wrong? 1566 00:45:04,680 --> 00:45:06,400 What went wrong? 1567 00:45:08,240 --> 00:45:08,280 You could say I didn't make the cut. 1568 00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:10,240 You could say I didn't make the cut. 1569 00:45:12,560 --> 00:45:12,600 You'll live. 1570 00:45:12,600 --> 00:45:14,120 You'll live. 1571 00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:17,480 Gee, I don't know how you do it. 1572 00:45:17,480 --> 00:45:19,360 Gee, I don't know how you do it. 1573 00:45:19,360 --> 00:45:19,400 You always know the right thing to say. 1574 00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:21,280 You always know the right thing to say. 1575 00:45:26,680 --> 00:45:26,720 Get you a drink? 1576 00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:28,400 Get you a drink? 1577 00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:28,440 That's very thoughtful of you, Theodore. 1578 00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:30,440 That's very thoughtful of you, Theodore. 1579 00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:30,480 Don't mind if I do. 1580 00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:31,960 Don't mind if I do. 1581 00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:32,000 Get yourself one of those girlie things you like so much. 1582 00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:36,040 Get yourself one of those girlie things you like so much. 1583 00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:36,080 On me. 1584 00:45:36,080 --> 00:45:37,920 On me. 1585 00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:37,960 Thanks, Bri. 1586 00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:39,800 Thanks, Bri. 1587 00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:39,840 Anything... 1588 00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:41,240 Anything... 1589 00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:43,840 ..for a friend. 1590 00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:45,280 ..for a friend. 1591 00:46:59,240 --> 00:46:59,320 1592 00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:04,200